The team consistss of budding Buddhist Alexander Georghiades, Afro chic chick Nomvula Mthethwa, hard-core cage fighter Wessel Vosser, and super-bike granny, Marleen Van Rooyen.

Night one falls to Georghiades, whose experimental menu includes vegetarian tagine and vegan chai tea ice cream. Surprisingly it’s met with approval, albeit in slow motion, with slow jokes and slow service. No one will blame his guests if they ask their taxi driver to ‘step on the gas’ home.

The second dinner party takes the uninitiated Pretoria guests to the ‘township’, where Mthethwa offers a unique style of dining. Dressed up in their 'gladdest' ghetto rags, the compliments flow, but the lack of cutlery, drinks and hosting does cause many a raised eyebrow.

Vosser’s ‘night of a thousand dishes’ looks for all the world like a brownie-points collection plate, as he caters to every culture, taste, whim and desire. It’s a miracle any conversation or fun can be inserted in between the flood of dishes that pour out of the kitchen.

It’s Van Rooyen’s turn to impress for the final night, and she pulls out all the stops with imported everything, including her main course, eel. Is it her fault that her fine attention to detail and beautifully home-crafted Come Dine With Me mosaics are either unnoticed or leave her bolshy guests underwhelmed? Well, she could have done a braai. And a course in psychology.

The episode of Come Dine With Me SA will air on Monday, 25 November at 20:00 on BBC Entertainment, channel 120 on DStv.