By Leigh Andrews

The book was written from the heart, taking the reader through the journey of emotions that Opperman went through after discovering her husband, Chips’ ‘emotional affair’ – based on an SMS on his phone asking ‘Kan e j bel?’ This marked the beginning of her journey of discovery and deceit.

She touched on the difficulty of writing a biography. Opperman questioned how many people actually know the truth of affairs. Writing the book was good as it forced her to do more than just sit and cry – she described the novel as a ‘magical, airy fairy one’, because strange things happened to her during the writing process. She also showed the gathering the big brown Cowry shells she picked up on Sheffield Beach, as described in her book as a sign from the heavens that she would eventually get through the ordeal and be okay. She took this as proof that there are special forces out there. As a result, Opperman was surprised to find her book had been stocked in the ‘self help’ section of a number of bookstores, and not in the esoteric section. Opperman closed the event by thanking everyone for their support and for attending the launch, saying she is blessed and that the right things happen in the right time, at the right place.

The book itself is for anyone who’s been touched by an affair, whether emotional or physical, and describes in great detail the way that Opperman herself, as well as others who she interviewed, discovered they were being cheated on, as well as the feelings of remorse and anger that follow for the cheater and ‘cheatee’, respectively. This goes beyond the emotional to psychosomatic disorders, where our emotions actually make us physically unwell as our entire body feels run down. Certain insights are shared by all interviewees, such as that the partner having an affair saves the name of the person they are cheating with under a name of the opposite sex on the phones, so that it does not raise suspicion if their spouses go through their cell phones. Most of the affairs listed started from seemingly innocent cellphone contact with a friend from the past. Opperman went through the typical stages of mourning and anger before finally reaching acceptance and forgiveness, based on the help of lots of friends and professionals – their contact details are listed at the back of the book.

You’ll put this down feeling a little bit sad but a lot more prepared to decipher the signs of an affair. The book is a good read and would help other people who are in the same boat. This is the essence of why Opperman wrote the book - to let all of us understand that there are reasons why we react in certain ways; that we all get a little bit crazy.

An Affair to Forget is published by Random House Struik.